Difference between Men & Women

 

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN’S PERSONAL  ADS:

40-ish…………………………..49.

Adventurous…………………..Slept with everyone.

Athletic………………………….No breasts.

Average looking………………..Moooo.

Beautiful…………………………Pathological liar.

Emotionally Secure…………….On medication.

Feminist…………………………..Fat.

Free spirit……………………….Junkie.

Friendship first………………….Former slut.

New-Age……………………….Body hair in the wrong places.

Old-fashioned…………………..No BJs.

Open-minded…………………..Desperate.

Outgoing………………………..Loud and Embarrassing.

Professional……………………..Bitch.

Voluptuous……………………..Very Fat.

Large frame…………………….Hugely Fat.

Wants Soul mate………………Stalker.

WOMEN’S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No

2. No Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want

5. I am sorry = You’ll be sorry

6. We need to talk = You’re in trouble

7. Sure, go ahead = You better not

8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!

10. You’re certainly attentive tonight Is sex all you ever think about?

MEN’S ENGLISH:

1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = Let’s have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?

7. May I have this dance? = I’d like to have sex with you.

8. Can I call you sometime? = I’d like to have sex with you.

9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I’d like to have sex with you.

10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I’d like to have sex with you.

11. I don’t think those shoes go with that outfit = I’m gay

About Teflon

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